What's up. I've already been in Japan a week and have made it my personal goal to eat all sorts of animals that you don't come by in the states. There are a ton of good places to eat around here, even the fucking McDonald's taste better, seriously it does, McDonald.... The fuck man? Mostly though I've found myself eating at suchi go around places, single handily bringing about the seafood ragnorak, no  paraphyletic creature is safe (you can use words like that when you went to college).

  

One way track to my mouth

So we went to this particular sushi go round with one goal in mind. To eat whale, horse, and hopefully a dolphin while we were at it. PETA if your reading this I mostly did because I hate you, bunch of fucking terrorists.

I'm coming for that dog next

Bad news is we went to the wrong one for whale, good news is they had horse and another little surprise waiting to be had. Lets start with the horse, majestic creatures that they are. Now sense this was a suchi place it was essentially horse tartar that I ate, just as there are a thousand ways to skin a cat (also on the list) i'm sure there a thousand ways to cook a horse, but this is what I got.

My dinning companion for the evening had described it to me as chewy, personally I didn't think so, but it did have a sort of grass taste to it that made sense, but I that I wasn't really expecting. I'm also not sure if it was just how they treated it before but it wasn't as bloody as a cow. It was worth trying but I don't think I would ever go out of my way to have it raw again.

The other little guy that I got to eat was none other than the all knowing, all powerful, mantis shrimp. If you're sitting at you computer right now like "whaaaa?" then I need you to get you're shit together and educate you're self.

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/mantis_shrimp

Don't worry I'll wait.

Down yet? No? Ok

Alright now that we have that cleared up, I got to eat one of those fuckers. (picture related, but only a little)

As soon as it was placed in front of me I could hear its making laughter, is it were saying "I will make you eating me as terrible and violent as my own death." Now these mothers were defiantly chewey, oh yes, and taste? You know that smell when you walk into the seafood section of the grocery store? imagine if they bottled that and could sprinkle it on you're food, and by sprinkle I mean DUMP IT ALL FUCKING OVER. That's what it tasted like. needless to say never again.

So I learned my lesson there, some things just aren't meant to be ate, but don't you worry your pretty little heads PETA I'ma find me some fucking dolphin, oh yes, and I'll eat it with a smile on my face. Because fuck you.